Round 18 2016/2017 – Premier League Picks (and Round 17 Results)

The results were tight this week with the exception of LJ who decided that he would “Go Big or Go Home” this week.  Spoiler alert – he went home.  Despite the disappointment of his results he will be happy that Liverpool pulled out an additional time winner against the Toffee men!   That 1-0 road win was enough to catapult JE from 4th to 1st (tied with ME)* despite getting no exact scores.  I once again fell down the charts a little due to my inability to pick exacts…. but in another unusual week LJ picked 5 results all with the wrong goal difference which is an incredible feat.

*This week the winner was actually Super Computer 1 who performed a ludicrous amount of analysis and data sequencing and selected 2-1 for every game.

Quick Life Tip – Prospective parents who may one day compete with their kids at anything should consider the names Aaron or Abby.

Again, we’re waiting for JE to make his picks…..

With Pards having been booted out of the club it’s time to update the graphic and put an end to another season of the “Alan Pardew Project” and start the Final Countdown project for Bob Bradley.

This weeks predictions – again, I’ve decided to not put my own to see if anyone notices but they are done and locked in (and surprisingly similar to SC4).

This week I asked LJ to provide a little bit of feedback to support his decisions so you are treated by two people’s intelligent feedback. I’ve done some thinking and I’m reasoning that this is the advantage that JE is seeking and using to his benefit.  Wait for the analysis and pick accordingly – it’s very smart but this week I may throw in a few curve-balls (that’s baseball vernacular – if you’re English or Jamaican you might prefer the term “googly”).
I’ve put LJ’s comments in italics and provide a little translation to help the comprehension.  All input is appreciated on a weekly basis – it’s hard to come up with this stuff for my three readers.  It turns out that KMFE who reads 10 books a week doesn’t read my 1 page a week – or at least I’ll find out if she does or not this week!

Arsenal V West Brom
LJ: Scoreline won’t reflect the gooners dominance

Arsenal will dominate the game despite some disappointing recent results.  To quote JE, “Arsenal are flat track bullies” and this is a game where you’ve got the Australian top-order facing the England bowlers…. should be a dominating performance by the Arse this one.  It has been said that last week Wenger was asked what he wanted for Christmas and answered that he just wanted Santa to come off the injury list.. at least that is what it sounded like but we all may have misheard.

Burnley V Middlesbrough
LJ: Battle of the relegation candidates but since Burnley beat us and we beat Middlesbrough I have to pick the former
Us, in this case is not the Moosemen (which, I learned is not actually a moose but a Hart deer with deformed antlers) but rather the scousers in red.  According to LJ, the largest indicator of results is how the teams performed against his team.  This isn’t as outrageous as it seems in this case as Burnley are much better at home than away and will beat Boro who are slightly better away from home.  Boro rely too heavily on Negredo who, throughout his time in the EPL is too inconsistent to bear that responsibility.

Chelsea V Bournemouth
LJ: A walk-in-the-park game for Chelski
I think this means that Chelsea are a much better team than Bournemouth… which is definitely true when the Cherries are away from home.  Bournemouth suffered a tough loss last week at home which will have dented their confidence – I expect a tough run of games for them.  This run is perfect timing for a Chelsea team that is ripe for the picking – Costa out and Kante out make Chelski not so great.  It will be a walk in the park but only because the Cherries won’t score.

Hull V Man City
LJ: That win over Arsenal will boost the Citeh’s confidence    
Not sure the relevance of this statement.  Sure, Citeh beat Arsenal but you don’t need any confidence to play a Hull team that will end the season in last place.

Leicester V Everton
LJ: The champions will continue to plug away
Plugging away means avoiding relegation 1 point at a time.  LJ has this mostly right as I fail to believe that Leicester have turned the corner – they came back 2 down with 10 men last week and thrashed Citeh the week prior but the reality is that they are still in the relegation battle, without Kante and a defense that handles corners as well as Watford (that is that they don’t).  Everton are all over the place but they will by stymied by a viking in goal (who isn’t as good as his dad was) and whether the red card was deserved or not, Vardy is not playing.  I’m going to start picking 1-1 for every Everton game.

Liverpool V Stoke
LJ: No goal for Joe on his return. We are looking to get a run going
This one took me a moment to figure out – Joe Allen was Brendan Rodgers big signing from Swansea and has recently been playing better than he ever did in a red shirt (of course by playing at Liverpool I mean sitting on a bench). Stoke through away 3 points against the Foxes and were able to squeeze by a terrible Watford.   I don’t see much in this game for the Potters… best to dial it back, take the loss, take some rest and prepare for weaker teams.

Man Utd V Sunderland
LJ: This lot has a few ‘easy’ games on the trot
It doesn’t matter what is actually going on, to a Liverpool fan, Man U always have something easier or better than everyone else.  I’ve picked Man U to eek out victories recently and then to dominate teams and they’ve done the opposite each time but at least getting at least a point out of it.  I expect them to get a result again but with Moyes returning they’re going to go easy on him because the total mistreatment they gave him as manager. Had he gotten his way and signed who he wanted they’d be in Champions League football already.  I’m sure Zlatan will score.

Southampton V Tottenham
LJ: Spuds to continue their good away record
Nothing controversial.  This will be an open game with some goals. Pochettino will be returning to his first home and he will find that the opposition team is not a walk in the park like Bournemouth.

Swansea V West Ham
LJ: As Bob draws closer to the sack
West Ham have turned the corner and Slaven has a better second half to look forward to than the first.  Bob will soon be back in America.

Watford V Crystal Palace
LJ: The Big Sam effect
Crystal Palace are better than Pardew let them be.  Big Sam is a great motivator (when it comes to making money) and will encourage his players to perform (to get more money from their agents) and everyone wins (especially Sam).   I’m raising Mazzarri up the ranks to second favorite to fired unless Troy Deeney can hit 100 career goals by the end of the year.

Should be a close game with the lanky-spangly Zaha winning an unearned penalty.

This weeks handy guide to losing money… put a tenner on these…  (Note: X/W means tied at the half and winning at the end.)

 

EDIT:
Full picks are finally in…. and I already lost the first bet as despite being outplayed for much of the first half Man U managed to break the deadlock in the 37th minute.