Round 14 2016/2017 – Premier League Picks

This week I’m going to try a little harder than last week and I’m guaranteeing that this extra effort won’t go to waste and I will finish at least equal, if not better, than I did last week.
Anyone wants to make a bet on that?

So here are the picks:

Once again JE is waiting until the last minute to pour over the detailed match reports to get that time advantage.  That “Mourinho Time” really comes in useful when making last minute tweaks to scores and predictions, aren’t they!

Bournemouth will be a challenge for the Red Scouse Army this week because it turns out that Coutinho wants to spend some time hanging with the family for the holidays and no doubt catching a Christmas Carol Panto featuring his lookalike.

There are mixed opinions on this one but I think Liverpool will be fine with Firmino and Origi, a player who Klopp really likes.  Away from the Anfield fortress there is a chance for a Gerrard style slip-up and for the Cherries to secure some points.
So Palace are hosting the Saints and everyone is wondering if maybe it’s time to reinstate the the “who’s going to be fired next” series.  This meme was started 2 years ago in December – the month when the normal Pardew descent begins – the difference this year is the absence of the ascent.  Newcastle got rid of him.  Palace wanted him.  Times change.  Except the flawed logic of owners who have decided they don’t want Pardew but they need one more loss to make sure. So, while Alan is on the chopping block the team will pull out all the stops to win the game that proves he his adequate to manage the team after all.  The five losses in a row and poor opening to the season will be magically offset by win this week that will rescue his job.

He’ll be fired next week when they lose to Hull.

If ever a game was destined for a 1-1 draw at home it’s a home Everton game where they are dying for points against a team that keeps drawing away from home (3 in 5). Sure to be a low scoring affair because Everton aren’t very good and…. well neither are the Trafford boys.   Schweinie might play so that will be a reason for KMFE to watch.

Oil Money against stolen Oil Money in the battle of the big dollar teams – Citeh and Chelski. Chelsea will start with a back 3 and this week it will fall apart as Citeh play Prince Harry and Navas very wide and force Chelski into playing either a back 5 or lose.  The Spanish Magician will produce an illusion of success and put them in front.  Conte will switch to a traditional back 4 to counter and he will be hailed as a genius for applying both a back 3 and back 4 tactic when they pull off a late equalizer….. but we can’t rule out Ya-Ya, Ya-Ya, Ya-Ya and his extra-time game winner.  Psyche!  Conte the genius pulls it off and Chelski win.

Middlesbrough at home against Hull. This is, as the pundits say, a six-pointer.  That translates roughly to “game that’s not worth watching.”

Stoke will not lose at home to a Burnley team that cannot score away from Turf Moor. Stoke will not score more than one because that involves being a great team and they aren’t.

Leicester are where they should have been last year.  Sunderland are better than their initial results showed and this game is really a toss up. I’m tired of predicting that Leicester will turn things around without KS minding the nets.  Leicester is more dilly-dally than dilly-ding this year.  Vardy is probably regretting not going to Arsenal but then he wouldn’t get in that team.. luckily the national team still has a spot for him.

Spuds have been drawing a lot and last week they finally lost.  They came out strong and took the lead against Chelski but then ended up giving the game away.  Swansea were behind Palace last week before ending up taking the game away.  By analysis of last week’s performance this game will be a battle between a team that wants to go up against a team that wants to go behind.   Swansea will get their wish and be behind early before realizing that the Palace defenders are on the other side of London for a reason.

WBA are a decent team doing quite well.  Watford are a bad team doing quite well. Usually the decent team will beat the bad team and that unfortunately means the Moosemen will slowly begin to fall out of the top half of the table.

The Hammers-ammers-mmers-ers-rs-s are playing in the echo-echo-echo-echo chamber and they just don’t seem to like-like-like-like-like it.  Arsenal are used to playing in large stadia so home advantage doesn’t exist for the home team and Arsenal will continue to stay in touch with the top for a few more weeks.

Here are the weekly bets

Next week I’ll try and post something amusing.  I’m taking this way too seriously 🙂